How Much Are You Worth?

Recently Mark and I were discussing our family costs and how we can lower them (ironically enough we were on our way to Capitol Reef for a vacation...hello! But it was MUCH needed - we hadn't been on one since I was 4 months preggo). Anyhow, Mark said, "It takes me a whole day to work for that (referring to something I had deemed worthy to purchase)."

Now, I'm a shopper, but I'm not a spender. I buy everything on sale, use coupons, find deals, etc. I am a fairly cheap wife to have. I'm not super romantic and do not desire frilly things to keep me contented. I am very happy being a stay-at-home wife and do not need fabulous vacations or costly outings to keep me sane. I highly value putting money away for retirement, emergencies, and saving for household goods we'd like to someday own. What I find almost the most attractive about my husband is that he's a planner! He has goals, ambitions, and plans for just about every facet of his life / our lives. He works incredibly hard and puts so much work and thought into everything he does. So I do not take lightly the money he earns - on the other hand I feel he often forgets that while I am not bringing in income- that I am worth A LOT.

I took this opportunity to remind him of all that I do at home with cleaning, cooking, caring for our child (most importantly). I then decided that I needed to 'break down' my stay-at-home salary to Mark. It went something like this -

For the excellent one-on-one childcare that I provide to our son 24/7:

During peak hours (7am-9pm, his waking hours): $100/day is very reasonable for one-on-one care and (remember this includes weekends - NO DAYS OFF :-) Since I nurse our son I have saved us at least $2000 this year in formula and untold amounts in protection from potential sickness and/or recovery time. As Mark often works late, has scouts, is away from home 24/7 as he travels for work - I am often the sole caregiver for our son throughout the duration of these hours. = $3000/month

During off-peak hours (9pm-7am): $25/day is very reasonable as I am the one who gets up with him at night if he awakens due to sickness, teething, or whatever. When Slade was first born and I was up multiple times a night to nurse I would have 'charged' much more than this, but now he rarely wakens...knock on wood. = $750/month

For my mediocre cooking skills (guaranteed to continue improving): For shopping (planning the deals, cutting and using coupons, not buying extraneous goods), preparing, storing, and cooking $500/mo. This includes packing daily lunches & nightly cooking.

For my mediocre cleaning skills (also guaranteed to continue to improve): I'll only ask for $300/month. I am always on time with clothes and dishes- but everything thereafter is done at my leisure (often behind schedule).

So I am worth at a minimum $4500/month. That's a decent job I've got right here - a good $50k.

And this is just for 1 child, as we keep piling them on I'm only going to increase in value!

Of course Mark had something to say about my Math between peals of manly laughter (my original calculation was somewhere closer to $20k/mo.) - he was truly amused.

Mark responded, "Okay, well in that case we need to re-evaluate my worth as well. We'll say that in addition to the salary I bring home from work, we need to figure out how much I'm worth for my general contractor duties (referring to all of the projects always going on around our home, most recently the beautiful awning he built). Then there's my landscaping and lawncare duties...."

Okay, so maybe he does make a little more than me going by this line of reasoning - but come on, stay-at-home moms are not really thought of in terms of monetary worth or what WE are giving up in order to give OUR children good lives. Mothers are the MOST important figures in their children's lives- they have such influence over their children and how their children eventually come to contribute to society. There's NO way a monetary value can be placed on this noble and blessed calling. Unlike a job, you HAVE TO care about those you are around daily. You cannot call in sick. You cannot be raunchy to them just because you're having a bad day. You run an entire household 24/7 FOREVER! It is really the coolest job around and that's why I'm so proud and feel so lucky to be able to stay at home - to have a husband who insists on it and works so hard to enable me to do so.

And yet still, when Mark refers to how many hours it took for him to earn something, I just tell him to put it on my tab!

Babies, Guns, & Beauty Pageants!

Whatever the reason that motivated John McCain to choose Sarah Palin as his V.P. is irrelevant because what it comes down to is that it doesn't matter. What does matter is that she's AWESOME and it was the perfect choice. This woman is a woman's woman AND a man's woman- who couldn't love her? She manages to have a wonderful family, amazing hobbies (hunting & gutting her own kills to boot!), an awesome husband backing her up (and apparently they still have sex...with each other as they just had a new addition to their family... unlike other presidential hopefuls and presidents (the very disgusting philandering Edwards, Clinton, and just about everyone else it seems), has won beauty pageants, scholarships, basketball tournaments- I could go on and on- she is fascinating! She started her current career in the PTA of all places! Alaska is so lucky, we're stuck with goofy Gov. Huntsman and his 10-hour workday's (did he get anyone's opinion before doing that?)! I found this blog through a friend of a relative and really enjoyed it regarding the new v.p. candidate - http://tickledpinkbaby.blogspot.com/ - you may too.

I'm so excited that she was the chioce for V.P. - let's kick Obama's butt outta the running! WHOO HOO!!!!

The Old Me & Doldrums of the Red Plague from this Freakish Wife

It happens every month- the dreaded red plague. I haven't had it for a year and a half (well not counting the WHOLE month postpartum) but now that Slade is nursing much less IT has returned. It was almost tempting to nurse him through elementary school just to avoid it coming back b/c as you may have surmised about me by now- I can get 'passionate' about some things. But man oh man, come that week before the plague hits I'm in the doldrums - so it would almost be worth being one of those women whose kids come up and ask them for a good nursing in complete sentences when they can physically go pour themselves a glass of milk from the fridge. For those of you who may not have ever seen or read the Phantom Tollbooth to recognize what the 'doldrums' is- it is one of those classic kids movies/books that is really and truly enjoyed most by free thinking and open minded adults - though it's also pretty weird. Since I don't want to do a review of this clever book/movie here I am listing a link where you can go to read about some of the interesting features of the movie - specifically the doldrums: http://www.lpl.arizona.edu/~bcohen/phantom_tollbooth/excerpts.html#leth More to come of that after a little explanation here.
Slade has been sick with a cold this week (poor kid got a double dose of Maya last week- who was sick with a cold herself- when he stuck his finger in her mouth (she is a biter through and through) at the ball game - but he was asking for it on both accounts.) Mark saw it in action and said, "Uh, babe, you may want to help your son out" (I as closer here). I look over in time to witness the debacle - much like that popular youtube video of Charlie and his older brother's finger (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OBlgSz8sSM) - I see Slade in slow motion stick his finger in Maya's mouth and his face changed from amusement to horror as the pain set in. By the time I made a move to retrieve it, she'd chomped down - HARD. Upon removal of his black and blue tooth-marked finger, Slade burst into tears and squealed in his very high-pitched infantile cry for a good 10 minutes and the night was pretty much a bust between the pair thereafter.
Anywho- so Slade has been a fairly unpleasant character as of late (due to his cold, not the finger)- fussing to be held then when you try to cuddle and comfort him he fusses to be let down. Upon being put down the cycle begins again and he seems personally afronted that you put him down in the first place in his delicate condition. (When Slade gets sick and requires such babying care he reminds me of his father the most- because let's face it- he resembles NOTHING of his father otherwise - Mark is a big boob when he's sick. Once I made him an on-demand chocolate-peanut butter shake and he turned up his nose at it b/c it had too much peanut butter. I always wonder how such a manly man that he is (and he totally is - the man can do anything!) can be brought down to such a lowly character position when he is afflicted with even minor ailments - my mom assures me that is just how men are though. I digress...).
Slade's ailment and fussiness have come at a poor time for the both of us, however, because I am also at a personal low. I was doing GREAT during the time of no red plague...never a tear shed, temper tantrums were easily restrained internally (let's face it, once you pass 20, ok maybe 25, the outward temper tantrums need to be out the door!), or doldrums were rarely experienced. Since the red plague struck a month ago and is now facing me again I have opened Pandora's box once again. I see through a haze of constant negativity and irritation interspersed with severe feelings of inadequacy, guilt, remorse, shame, and the like - and are we really suprised I experienced post partum depression (I've just got really hormonal genes)? This, of course, causes distress to Mark (who is ever the optimist and sees life as very pointless and wasted to be anything other...sigh) who either tries to ignore my irksome mood or get me to get it out of my system quickly. I try not to let it affect my relationship and treatment of Slade (he shouldn't have to deal with such advanced adult inadequacies yet) so I save it for Mark when he gets home from his always LONG days at work - lucky feller huh? I skulk about and sigh and feel sorry for myself then repeat. Thus I am experiencing the doldrums - and strangely enough I must cycle them through to get over them though I often think I should be able to talk myself out of them since I am aware of them...?

Anyhow- I chanced to talk to several of my East Coast best buds this past weekend (when the minutes were free) much to the dismay of Mark b/c that's also the only time we really get to have couple time anymore that isn't tainted with exhaustion. I spent hours on the phone with them catching up and just enjoying myself... I love my Southern friends- never a dull moment with these characters and I never worry about the goofy and off the wall things we say and share with one another! I realized how much I missed the East Coast 'me' sometimes and wondered why...

To share a quick story to help illustrate the forthcoming point relating to the doldrums as well as the East Coast me, one day while Mark and I were visiting back home in NC for one of my best friends weddings we were touring the land. We got lost (b/c apparently after 5 years of absence my brain replaces 10-year lived images of my youth with the new stuff b/c there's just not enough room for both??) - and after driving around lost and wasting precious time I tell Mark we just need to pull over and ask someone for directions. In the South (where I was born and raised after my dad retired from the military), when you ask someone for directions you get a friendly greeting followed by the directions then conversation about anything and everything about you - because they're really interested and you both just made a new friend. Out here in Utah (where Mark was born and raised) if you stop and ask directions you generally get a look of irriation followed by quick crappy directions that are not going to be repeated again so you'd better get it right the first time and don't even think of making personal conversation - no one wants to know about you and they've already got too many friends so dont' bother.
Mark: "We're not going to pull over and ask for directions, we'll just keep looking."
I spot a guy walking down the side of the street and say, "Pull over and I'll ask him."
Mark: "We're not going to ask some random person where this place is, it's rude."
Me: "Are you kidding me?!?"
Mark: "You don't just ask random strangers for directions."
Me: "Are you seriously kidding me - pull over we're in the South - I know how to talk to my people."
It was at that moment that we found the place we were looking for by chance so no conversing with strangers was necessary much to Mark's delight but that is a phrase that will live in infamy in our relationship with one another - "I know how to talk to my people." At the time we were both highly irriated at one another (and we weren't even married yet!) so the conversation was a bit much to be seen as comical at the time. But now years later Mark will bring it up at 'appropriate' moments and laugh. Granted Mark is one of those who prefer to rely solely on themselves for everything- a very laudable characteristic - so he views asking for help as weak in a sense.
Mark always jokes with me when I reminisce about the good ole South- "Chocolate and money fall from the heavens and God's greatest creatures inhabit the hills" or something like that. Our ideals of beauty, interesting culture, and fun are obviously very different.

I guess what I just miss is the beauty and the people. For whatever reasons it's just a more relaxed environment and the people are laid back and have got some serious character- easy pleasey, hard to offend, quick to share and enjoy...ahh the South.

One is probably asking themselves right about now, "Well, geez if this girl doesn't like it here so much then why doesn't she move back, or why did she come here in the first place?" It's because there are ZERO guys in the South that are members, or the guys who are members are like your brothers b/c you've spent every single activity in their company and it just seemed wrong. So I came here and found a wonderful guy who is from here and works here...so I'm here...and now so are both of our families. Don't think I'm not trying to convince him to go elsewhere- I love travelling, seeing sights, and learning new cultures - plus there are not nearly as many opportunities for some good missionary service here so sometimes I feel like we're almost wasting our time here.

I just really miss not having to worry so much that something I am going to do or say in a moment of idiocy or just innocent frivolity is going to offend many. I used to cut loose and laugh and have fun with my ladies back home - but here in utah I've had to learn (and am in a constant state of still learning) how to board up areas of my personality that are not necessarily welcome here in UT in order to function moderately well with others (at church mostly b/c I dont interact much with others past that since I'm a stay-at-homer now). It's moreso for my more normal husband than anything else. Just the other day he lovingly referred to me as his 'freakish wife'. I was slightly concerned at this very descriptive yet ambiguous term but he assured me that though I have some 'freakish' qualities he will love me for all time and eternity...phew. Yes, he's a very romantic man.

Actually, at this point I'll be you're wondering how in the world Mark and I even got together with him being so normal it's to the point of holding back too much and me on the opposite end of the spectrum? Well, wonder no longer- Mark likes to live in color as do I. Some things people may never get to know about him unless you're close to him are that he's an incredibly talented musician (acoustic and electric guitars as well as harmonica!), yummy singer, and incredibly intuitive songwriter. He's also a man of extreme ethical ability & character, political angst, engineering genius, serious scouting flavor, and is the hardest working man I've ever met. He bought incredible red couches for goodness sakes- what guy does that? I've never met a guy like Mark- he has his faults, but man is he the coolest husband! His sense of humor is something else you'll never catch unless you're around him- he is so cleverly funny. He doesn't talk uselessly as he feels many do (myself definitely included)- but he NEVER misses an opportunity to make the kind of funny statement that is too clever to be able to repeat back to people. He's got that 'You-had-to-be-there kind of humor. So though he maintains a very normal personality- he too is slightly 'freakish' himself- in an amazing way though- he's perfect for me.

I just thrive on true inward & outward pleasure, having an honest to goodness good time, and the diversity of personalities. I love clever humor and red couches.

Not much of a summation here- not that the rest of it is in any kind of format though - here is a little convo. from the Phantom Tollbooth to help you understand, not that you'd really care to, how I feel during this doldrum period of my red plague from this freakish wife...or for your reading pleasure solely:

"Well, if you can't laugh or think, what can you do?" asked Milo.
"Anything as long as it's nothing, and everything as long as it isn't anything," explained another. "There's lots to do; we have a very busy schedule-
"At 8 o'clock we get up, and then we spend
"From 8 to 9 daydreaming.
"From 9 to 9:30 we take our early midmorning nap.
"From 9:30 to 10:30 we dawdle and delay.
"From 10:30 to 11:30 we take our late early morning nap.
"From ll:00 to 12:00 we bide our time and then eat lunch.
"From l:00 to 2:00 we linger and loiter.
"From 2:00 to 2:30 we take our early afternoon nap.
"From 2:30 to 3:30 we put off for tomorrow what we could have done today.
"From 3:30 to 4:00 we take our early late afternoon nap.
"From 4:00 to 5:00 we loaf and lounge until dinner.
"From 6:00 to 7:00 we dillydally.
"From 7:00 to 8:00 we take our early evening nap, and then for an hour before we go to bed at 9:00 we waste time.
"As you can see, that leaves almost no time for brooding, lagging, plodding, or procrastinating, and if we stopped to think or laugh, we'd never get nothing done."
"You mean you'd never get anything done," corrected Milo.
"We don't want to get anything done," snapped another angrily; "we want to get nothing done, and we can do that without your help."
"You see," continued another in a more conciliatory tone, "it's really quite strenuous doing nothing all day, so once a week we take a holiday and go nowhere, which was just where we were going when you came along. Would you care to join us?"
"I might as well," thought Milo; "that's where I seem to be going anyway."

What you never want to walk in on...

Yes, that IS my toilet scrubbrush in his hands...

I'm Losing It ALL!

Ok, so I am done with the "Let's all be sure to raise Strippling Warriors and not Divorcee Porn Addicts talks". I'm moving onto a more immediately pressing issue that affects me and my family from day to day - my issue of weight - a more weighty matter, if you will.

I'm going to be very open and honest here though this is a very sensitive and secretive issue for many - I'm at least 25 lbs. overweight. I am 5'5 and weigh almost 165 lbs. - I should at the most for my height and body type weight 140, thus I need to rid myself of at least 25 lbs. I was about 10 lbs. overweight when I got pregnant (I was 140 when I got married over 2 years ago) and got up to 192 during pregnancy!! For those of you who are mathematically challenged - that's a gain of 42 lbs when my recommended weight gain for my pregnancy was between 25-35 lbs. Granted I birthed an almost 10 lb. baby - but I had lost all but 5 lbs. of the weight in the first 2 months postpartum with nursing and sickness. My husbnd thought he finally had his wife back.

Now almost a year post partum I have gained 10 lbs. on top of the 5 I still had left to lose when I was already 10 lbs. overweight...got it?

I promised myself by the time my baby hit the year mark I'd have lost it all and then some. Well, at this point that is NOT a do-able goal, but I am determined to make it back to the place where I had only 5 left to lose and then work from there on a new game plan for losing more by year end (I was 120 in my 'anorexic' high school days and looked pretty darn good so that's my ultimate goal!)- so that'd be losing about 10 lbs. in a month's time. That'd be a little over 2 lbs. per week. For someone who is overweight, losing- especially at first- should not be too much of a challenge though I have maintained my excess weight, which means I will have to make some changes and stick to them.

I have told people before I was attempting to lose weight by a certain time period but that fell through and they love me anyway and accept me as I am so the whole 'telling people to solidify the committment to yourself thing' kind of fell through the cracks on this one. I know have come to the conclusion that I went about it the wrong way and am trying it again. I am telling whoever reads this blog that I AM going to lose 10 lbs. by September 20th 2008 when I give my son's Birthday party at Sugarhouse Park. There WILL be lots of celebrating going on!

I am NOT going to post a pre-weight loss picture here b/c let's face it- those pictures hang around in our subconcious and when we see the person (as most of you see me on a daily basis) we can only see that disturbing vision of them. Just catch a gander of me at church or wherever and assess my figure now so you can give me big congratulations and mean it later on. I'll post again regarding this goal weekly and if I am NOT hitting my needed numbers - then HARRASS me, JUDGE me, VERBALLY ACCUSE me of being slovenly..ok, well maybe that's going a bit far- but please help me! It is up to you bloggers of America to help my husband get his wife back so she can unabashedly put on a swimsuit and swim with her son at the pool or not have to constantly tug at her shirt to hide the jelly rolls or avoid reflections of herself and pictures because the resulting images are more than disturbing! I would think I was the most fatty patty of the universe whenever I pigged out for awhile and reached 145-150lbs then exercise like a wild woman to get it off - Oh how the tides have changed! And don't excuse me with the whole "Well, you've had a baby and your body has really changed"...DER. But I see tons of women get back into shape after 6 babies so that's not a deal-breaker for me..besides the fact that I WAS almost back down and took up some bad habits...though I will say I have never been so sedentary in my life or tied to the house with nursing and naps (there's the only excuse that will pass my lips and I'm even overriding that one now that the baby is more on the go and nursing much less).

Well, that's it for now. Peace Out.

(P.S. I made Mark promise me that as soon as I lose the weight I can get pregnant again, so this is very important to me in more ways than one!! :)

Ugly Baby?

Ok, this may seem in contrast to my most recent post, but I assure you that it is written with the most Christlike spirit available to me at this point in time....

Mark and I have an ongoing argument that there is no such thing as an ugly baby. Now, I have seen quite a few in my day and time but Mark swears they're all cute- in that baby way. I say they are ugly babies but they grow so quickly some really grow into their looks some don't for awhile... some are ridiculously cute babies who turn into the opposite as adults or just stay ridiculously good-looking forever (lucky devils!). Either way it works out ok in the end b/c girls just dress cute, hit the gymn, and wear gobs of makeup- problem solved. Guys- well, doesn't really matter what you do (fat, jobless, overwhelmingly hairy, momma's boy, stay-at-home dad wannabe, whatever...) b/c you'll always be able to find a girl, we are just the overwhelming majority- esp. in UT.

But let's hear what you have to say - is there such thing as an ugly baby or not? (yes, I am aware they are all beautiful in the eyes of God, this isn't a judgmental thing, just a curiousity thing...no names okay?!?)

Defining thoughts

I haven't had any defining moments lately but I feel like I have had some defining thoughts. Recently someone close to our family pointed out to me that I was being dangerously judgmental of others while chiding those who are judgmental of me and mine. Having the truth placed before you, articulated in such a way to let you know that perhaps you have some re-thinking to do without being too harsh is a skill which I lack but envy in others. I don't think we can learn how to be better without having the truth placed before us when needed - a good swift kick in the pants. :) I'm pretty sure that natural tact may never be a forte or mine, but I'm determined to refine my current skill level significantly. It reminded me of a book my sister read recently, I think it was called 'The Last Lecture' or soemthing to that effect. What stood out to my sister in the book is that the author shared a story of how a fellow colleage- even somewhat of a wiser elder to the author I believe - articulated to him graciously that it was too bad he was a jerk b/c he had valuable things to share but the way he behaved put people off towards him. Thus rendering his usefulness useless and depriving him of valuable life experiences. That was a defining moment to him and he changed his tune. I think I'm in the middle of his story and it's time for me to change my tune a bit. I need a tune-up.

This past week I have been noticing in my daily actions, conversations, and thoughts how much work is needed in the area of being Christlike for me! It's startling and has been very disturbing on a constant basis and level of consciousness so I think writing a little about it may ease my mind a bit.

I have made it a recurring goal for myself to replace the negative thoughts (even pet peeves!) that pop into my head with something that I am grateful for and/or find something good about what I'm judging harshly and then remember that I am far from perfect as well. While it's ok to have the negative feelings b/c I believe they are natural thinking in our society - they are not ok to often share b/c 1. Sharing a problem without a realistic and reasonable solution is useless and selfish. 2. Putting negativity into someone else's day on purpose only serves to harm in many ways. 3. It may not be a negative thing at all, just something I've contrived in my day to fill my time up when I need to be doing just the opposite. 4. We are so blessed in our society that there are many imperfections but overall if is the BEST - so just help work on perfecting - actively.

I talked at length to my sister-in-law about the above and wondered aloud how I could make a difference in the world in a positive way as we worked on a home improvement task together. How could I make it better for my child and so on. She sat for a moment (she is a very sweet hearted girl whose personality is almost the reflective opposite of mine) and said she'd been having similar thoughts to mine since she also had a child recently. She said the most she could decide to do right now while she was trying to figure out how else to make a difference was to make it a difference in her home. HELLO- isn't that what the church teaches at its core? Ok, so that is why we go to church to be reminded that we should be actively trying to be more perfected, not bog ourselves down with dreariness and complaints! So thanks Michelle and Dan! I have new goals for this year (besides weight loss of course, that's still high on the list but apparently low on daily to-do's...sigh). I have a new goal to be a better member of my church for the sake of my family, friends, and society. Ahh, now I feel better. It takes a very healthy and hearty willingness and positive mentality to be actively engaged in righteous endeavors - it is my goal to develop and re-define my daily words, acts, and behaviors. I challenge whoever reads this to share their own thoughts on the matter and be actively engaged. I tell my Valiant girls this every Sunday, so it has been in my brain somewhere. I think it's like Dan said - it's easy to see the motes in other eyes while bypassing the beam in ours. I'm going to start tugging at my beams - this may take awhile!

The Secret Life of An American Teenager, Jewel, & PORN

What in the world? Has anyone else besides me seen the previews for this TV series on ABC FAMILY of all channels!?!?!?!? They basically consist of a teenage girl holding a pregnancy test that reads she is pregnant and a look of shock and concern washing over her....what! I had sex and now I'm pregnant...this is going to mess up MY life now!!!

What the.....?!?!? Are ya kidding me? This is the Secret Life of An American Teenager. This show makes being a teenager sound depraved and guaranteed to mess up your life forever....unless you don't get caught. When did teenagers become so completely air-filled, hormone driven (and ACTING on them) maniacs or has it always been that way and I'm just living in a warp alter-world? There's no way I'm going to be able to have Cable TV in my home in the very near future and risk my child's innocence here (b/c let's face it, apparently mine went down the toilet when Friends came out and my innocence waved bye bye to me way back then- though I am going to have to force the issue with myself very soon for Slade's sake!). Yes, I KNOW he'll come face to face with it someday...but I'd rather that someday be later than sooner when he's more equipped psychologically to handle it. I'll admit I am very tempted to homeschool him, but as I tell my Primary girls - you are out there in the world among people who don't have the light of the gospel and do bad things for a reason...to help them and show them there is still light in the world, how much cooler can missionary work get- to just save one soul right? If we remove all of that light out of the schools that are becoming so desperate and depraved...what then? We'll see when that time comes...


These shows focus on the individual as being just that, an individual. Are we a bunch of thoughtless 'individuals' walking around together in the same world focusing only inwardly who only care about what is going to benefit them or how they are going to get the next free ride in life and cop to no consequences for their actions? They are always the victim and never the abuser for one reason or another. A society of individual victims - good grief!


Sorry ABC FAMILY - but I don't see my teenage daughter or son having to have a secret life filled with sex, drug, lies, pregnancy, etc... I won't be able to relate to this show regardless. I think we should petition against this show- where will the depravity STOP! When we STOP allowing it to be seen- or paying for it to be seen- on our own televisions! Maybe it's just that I don't have the soul of an artist, and don't see the beautiful abstract hurting individuals of life as something near worthy of my precious time- I see groups of capable humans who need to climb down off of their self-piteous molehill and go help someone build a mountain!

I'm going to admit to something here- I have watched Sex and the City (the editted version, not that that probably matters to Heavenly Father). I flipped by it the other day when my sister was hanging out with me after the baby was in bed and Mark was out of town. We watched the show long enough to find out that one of the women had gotten pregnant and was going to have an abortion because this horribly inconvenient thing had happened to her. The poor woman needed support from her friends. One of the friends had been trying everything she could think of to get pregnant, b/c having a child was all she ate, slept, or breathed. She was disgusted by her friend's choice and ran out. The other two women consoled her readily admitting that abortions (plural for one of them) had been the best choice for them- even though they had been stupid to get pregnant and not careful in the first place.

When one of the women who'd had an abortion was discussing it with her boyfriend (who had 'stayed the night') she told him he could not tell his friend, who was teh father of the baby- b/c after all, the father doesn't have a right to know his child is going to be hideously mutilated and killed right? The guy gets mad that she told him and has put this burden on him by telling him he cannot tell his good friend. He asks her why she just doesn't have the baby and give it to friend 2. who really wants one. Her reply,"Its not like a sweater, you don't just go around letting someone else have your baby". Yes, I guess it's much much better to murder a wanted child than to have it, that makes TOTAL sense. I have been completely, fully, and utterly disgusted with that show and its followers ever since!

I think Jewel sums it up best in her recent best-selling hit (since when is Jewel a country singer?), "I'm gonna love myself more than anyone else" beautiful sentiment isn't it?

http://www.onlynewmusic.com/jewel-stronger-woman-lyrics-and-video/


We need to tell our teenagers daughters/sons to quit being a slave to themselves (thanks for the contrary advice Brittney Spears) and go out and find someone who has real issues they need help with. It takes a whole village to raise a child - but if that whole village is stuck looking at themselves in the mirror then who is going to do it?

And if I hear ONE MORE TIME that some guy (husbands especially), has a porn 'addiction' I'm going to FREAK OUT. It's not an addiction, it's a CHOICE!!! Are you NOT listening to the prophet and quorom in EVERY GENERAL CONFERENCE AND PRIESTHOOD SESSION when they specifically speak about it and tell you to stay away from it like the PLAGUE?!?!?! I know they do them in every priesthood session b/c Mark comes home and complains that he has to listen to our wonderful general authorities EVERY TIME spend their precious time and words on those who can't seem to get it straight and keep it straight!! Oh My gosh, I'm going to have a meltdown if I hear one more man who has ruined his entire eternal family because they thought seeing some fake sex was more important than a happy life FOREVER. I can count 20 guys that I alone have come across and found out (through various sources- unhappy wives, children, etc...) that this has happened to them. Just recently my neighbor left his wife and child, who he CHOSE to be sealed to for time and eternity, for another woman. Turns out he had issues with porn as well, go figure. I have 2 immediate questions: 1. Who in the heck do you think you are guy? 2. Who is this disgusting woman that he's hooked up with who will become engaged to an absolute sleezeball like this and continue to ruin his family and relationship with his son (which was already lacking from my personal witness). If it weren't for these apparently deseperate women letting these sleezeballs get away with just about anything and everything then maybe the world would be a better place. If we could control ourselves then where would the guys be able to go to work off their every desire? Who really DOES have the power here women?!!!

It's a CHOICE people. NO, JUST BECAUSE THE REST OF THE WORLD SAYS IT'S "NORMAL" DOES NOT MEAN IT'S NORMAL OR THAT GOD CONDONES IT. What is so difficult to understand here??? They should put warning labels on porn like those on cigarrettes, - WARNING: Do NOT watch this if you hope to have a happy, blessed life. Do NOT watch this if you wish to have time to better yourself when you have free time, b/c you will only end up obsessing over it and becoming so entrenched that you will lose EVERYTHING near and dear to you. Do NOT watch this if you truly care about anyone else but yourself. You will NOT be a worthy priesthood holder from this point forward. You will NOT be able to guide your family with the spirit. You will NOT have the respect or love of your family once you engage in the acts, breaking your vows, which porn invariable leads to. Need I go on?

I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE PEOPLE. Really, what is so dang difficult to understand here? QUIT WATCHING PORN. STOP IT. STOP IT RIGHT NOW. RIGHT NOW. RIGHT NOW.

Truly, if I hear of ONE MORE DUDE (sorry, but I've never personally met any woman who has such a problem, I'm sure they exist- but let's deal with the main problem here shall we?) who can't control himself or his actions anymore, ruining the lives of all around him, I am personally going to go over and flog him.

WHAT IS OUR SOCIETY COMING TO PEOPLE?!?!?

Ode to Daddy

I can't put into words how grateful I am to have such an amazingly WONDERFUL husband and father as Mark is. He goes out every day and works so hard for our family and we are so blessed in return for his efforts. He lets me, nay insists, that I be a stay at home mom so our child can have the best - his mommy's attention for as long as he needs it. He is the smartest man I know. He is the most talented man I know (you should hear his songs and his oh-so-laudable guitar skills....make a heart melt!). He is the cutest daddy I know. He is the most honest man I know. He is dedicated to making me happy and improving our family and life always. He is a great scoutmaster and sacrifices much to do his calling to the best of his ability. He is my very best friend in the whole world and can make me and Slade laugh like no one else. His mind works everything out so quickly with so many facets of life, but for the life of him he cannot multi-task. He cannot match an outfit together for Slade to save his life (whether it's matching colors or matching seasons to clothing) - but he loves his family! Lately he has had NO free time for himself, none, nada, zip, ZERO b/c of all the To Do's that keep piling up with his work, scouts, and housing projects. This very moment as I write he is up re-roofing our garage (doesn't seem fair does it?) with his brother. Instead of rocking a guitar he has been rockin up new roof and awning for our garage - he is fantabulous!!

It seems like all the world shows these days are absentee or stupid dads (dare I mention a few: Brittney Spears man, that Baldwin brother, Bill Clinton, etc.. ) and that's the reality of life. I dare to say there are many many a father who goes unrecognized (cause that's just how guys are) for the wonderful persons that they are and that we should put more of these guys in the limelight! For all their hard work and effort in the ho hum day to day of life, at least once in awhile we should put them up on a pedastal. And let's be honest, Father's Day just doesn't cut it, it's very nill in comparison to Mother's Day.

Here's a picture Ode to the father of my children.. Slade & I love you sooo much Mark Taylor!!!

Meet the Folks...

Mark was out of town the week before last and I was watching TV, catching up on emails & blogs(sending out my mass email to complain about UDOT), and so forth until the time when I would pass out from tiredness and not realize Mark wasn't next to me affectionately trying to manipulate me into snuggling him (I'm not readily a snuggler - oddly that changed with marriage?). The clock struck midnight and an interesting-looking (I was DECEIVED) show comes on called 'Meet the Folks' - about getting some attention-starved, flamboiant, outwardly-horny beyond belief teens to come and stay with a family for like a weekend or week or something (apparently my attention was divided) while the parents of another attention-starved flamboiant teen try to get to know them- in a reality tv show kind of way- to decide which of the visiting teens will get to be their child's girlfriend/boyfriend/date (hereagain, attention was divided...you're probably wondering now why I'm sharing with you something I paid such little attention to myself...in the beginning). I had to laugh when the girls began to show up at the parents home, one-by-one, hanging all out of their self-imposed skanky attire, faces painted with layers of cakey looking makeup, ten-toned hair, and chippendale attitudes. Behind the scenes the girls would get interviewed about their impressions of everything so far and they each would trash the other girl, etc... The parents would ask the girls questions about their sordid pasts and the girls would have to answer honestly...at this part I felt pity for men when they gave their answers. You'd really have to watch this show to get the full effect... Anyhow, the parents aren't impressed (shocker, I know) and meanwhile their son is in the hottub with all three buxum beauties making out with each on in turn, then trying to get them to show him their chi-chi's. He didn't have to do much convincing, for all three were on the verge of lifting the tops to their scanty swimsuits anyhow when daddy walks out and dutifully chides his son for being a pig and tells them to come inside...poor son can't catch a break, but I'm thinking daddy was hoping he'd planned the timing right and might witness the event himself...no such luck he was a second too soon.
Anyhow, the next day they are all at dinner and they bring one of each of the girl's ex-boyfriends to dinner and forbid the girls from speaking and have each of the guys in turn rat on their former lady loves. Here's what I'm getting to, hold onto your seat. They get to one of the ghetto goddesses and her boyfriend tells the family to beware of her as she lets some serious stinkies rip quite frequently! I was almost on the floor cracking up- but the best part is that she ADMITTED to it and said something along the lines that she wasn't ashamed of it a bit and that's just the kind of girl she was...(you should really check this out if you ever get a chance...http://www.tv.com/meet-my-folks/the-figgs/episode/184811/summary.html?tag=ep_list;ep_title;5

Well, I'm here to announce to the world that pregnancy does some FUNKY things to your body and since giving birth I too have had some gastronomical issues occassionally. I'm still taking my prenatals (I'm nursing still), Calcium, and Fish Oil (gotta smarten up my average son...) and I think the daily combination reaches a boiling point...if you will... at times and renders me helpless to it's consequences. Mark feels the need to complain loudly and vehemently and direct me to visit the restroom upon such occassions. I tell him it's a free country (well, so far...) and unless he wants to do the nursing and take the vitamins then tough titty (he's not very fond of that phrase either)! Mark proceeds to let one rip at least once a night when we're all snuggled up in bed and acts shocked when I call HIM out for it. He says it's just so much more disgusting when women do it and we should be proper. He really is thoroughly disgusted when I do it...which makes me want to do it all the more, especially when he gets verbally upset with me because of it. He tells me he can't believe how disgusting women are in real life and that we should be better. What is this gender inequality of which he speaks - I am truly outraged that men feel like we should wear all the fitting layers (I peeled 4 off last night after a blazing day), wear hose (I REFUSE), wear bras (weren't we already liberated here??), wear make-up, grow long hair (again, with the blazing weather!), shave our legs, armpits, etc..., do our nails, and last but most importantly BEAR THEIR CHILDREN and have regular periods. Where is the justice I say?!?!? So yes, when I get called out for 'looking at the trees' as my dear mother refers to it for some odd reason- you'd better believe you're gonna get backlash. So far this has not deterred Mark's quest to put an end to my covered wagons nightly- but I do not relent easily either. Thus, just about every night ends with the aforementioned argument...followed by an argument of whose turn it is to say the prayer. There is no compromise, there is no justice!

My Big-Headed /But Otherwise Completely Average Son

Ok, so just took Slade in for his 9 month check up- I really look forward to these Dr. visits (not for the shots though, poor child) just so I can see how much more he's grown and what his percentiles are. When he was born (9lbs.12 0z. 22 inches long) he was nearly 100% for everything- head, height, weight - whoo hoo - I'd done good! I'd given birth (or rather had him ripped from me in a very serious surgical routine after FOUR days of labor and NOTHIN) to a very healthy giant! For some reason this was a source of great pride to me. We all do that as mothers though, you can't help it, I think it's biological. We compare. what is your child doing that mine isn't or vice versa. Oooooh, my child is already in the 97th percentile for height, he is guaranteed to be Master of the Universe for sure!

The nurse, who usually oogles over Slade, just measures him, weighs him and walks out. When she came back I eagerly asked about his stats...(to take a page out of Amelia's blog):

Me: So nurse, what are his stats? (me bouncing a little on the edge of my seat awaiting an affirmative that my child is still large for his age)
Nurse: Oh, he's completely average- 50% for weight and 55% for height - but his head is a little large, nothing for concern, just a little large - 75%.
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - my son is average?!?!?!?!?
Yes, unreasonable I know, but man I loved hearing he was big.

Upon Mark's arrival home from work:

Me: Our son is completely average Mark.

Mark: Huh? How's his package (he apparently has a slight condition of excessive fat above his 'winkie' that pushes the skin forward though he's been circumcised (again, poor kid)- kind of like the bigger guys who's winkies appear small b/c their fat pushes the skin forward...or something along those lines. I've never personally witnessed this but have heard about it from other sources....ok, Mark told me. Anyhow, his winkie had become a little infected looking b/c the skin is always over it. He's been man (or baby) handling it for weeks now (i hear this is a guy thing even from his young age- as soon as his diaper comes off he's got some sort of magnetic pull to it..with BOTH hands...making sure it's still there I presume?) but lately he's been going at it with a little more frenzy. Little did I know I was supposed to be pulling back the skin daily (I usually just try to steer clear of it as they are STILL mysteries to me!) to help it attach to where it was supposed to...no, I'm not going to be more graphic than that - but his winkie is fine overall).

Me: His package is fine, nothing a little Bacitracin won't clear up. Did you hear me? Our son is average in height and weight now...except for his slightly large noggin- which is probably your fault - he's got a big brain like yours! (which is one of the only ways our son resembles either one of us (besides his hair color)- seriously, whose kid is he really?)

Mark: (sighs and retreats to the bathroom)

So there you have it - his 9 month stats, he's average in height and weight. Once his looks start to go I'll really be in for a depressive episode. My Dr. also told me I'm nursing him way too often (5 times a day is too much at almost a year?!?) and I need to cut back and give him more table food. I really disliked nursing for that first month or so, but now I love it. It's sweet and cozy, conveniet, FREE, and best of all I'm the only one who can give it to him so that makes me special to him!
Oh well, things could be worse I suppose.... On the upside- he is now beginning to feed himself and shakes his head vigorously and emphatically "NO!" when I try to feed him with a spoon myself. I still force the food on him, (gotta keep those stats up to at least AVERAGE!) but it's nice that he's showing some preference and personality now. :)

Slade the Dancing Sleeper

Lately Slade has become quite the excellent sleeper (sickness and teething aside). He very dutifully and easily goes down for his first nap 2 hours after he wakes up in the morning (around 7-8am). When he wakes up after 2-2.5 hours he's generally a very happy guy for the next 2.5 -3 hours (when it's time to go down for his next nap). Hereagain, he goes down easily for this nap for another 1.5-2 hours.

I don't know why or how all of the sudden he is so consistently sleepy- but I've been richly blessed! I love having the free time to get chores done, get ready for the day, catch up on emails/blogs, garden, etc... but when he's ready to wake up I'm ready to have his chubby little boy body in my arms again. I'll even admit to truly becoming my mom- lately I've been sneaking into his room before I go to bed to get a peek at his sleeping angel face - how adorable he is!!

He is so easily entertained and such a funny little toddler-man. Lately I have been trying to teach him the word Dance- rather enact the word when he hears it based on observing my dancing skills. He will toss his head around and his upper body moves with it then he'll stop and look at me and start cracking up when I do it back! Ah, how I love my child. His giggles and smiling eyes fill my heart with the greatest joy that I just have to grab him up and smother him with kisses. Of course doing this ends the funny moment as he is not quite a snuggler just yet, but man oh man I cannot resist his charm!

When I was pregnant, never could I imagine what my baby would be like - that he would cry is certain, but how pleasing his disposition would be and how much joy it would bring to us was up in the air. I truly believe that I was in doubt that I was really going to have a baby until I saw him- I was shocked! I heard myself keep repeating on the surgery table when I heard him cry for the first time, "Is that my baby? I have a baby? Do I really have a baby Doctor?" The Doctor was a bit taken aback - was I really suprised after laboring for so long then consenting to serious surgery thinking it wasn't but to produce a child? I could hear a little amused suprise in his voice as he answered me in the affirmative and peeked around the curtain to assess my mental stability. Now when I look at him I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that he was created from the love Mark and I have for one another and brought into this world through the gospel. It is so difficult for me to fathom how much our Father in Heaven loves me and my little family and how blessed we are!

Every night Mark and I thank our Heavenly Father for our baby boy and we ask for help parenting him as He would have us to. I am so very grateful for the gospel in our lives a million times over. I know our Heavenly Father loves us so much and is always there for us in our darkest hours as well as our very happiest ones. I am so grateful for my testimony, for my husband, for my baby (and babies to come!!), and for my life. I don't know what I did to deserve so much, but I will do my best to raise the bar in my life each day!

The Best Tank Tops EVER!

Just thought I'd share this as I've been on a quest to find the best tank tops to go under my T-shirts yet over my G's. Since I began nursing my chest has taken on a whole new dimension that has caused my wardrobe to change functionality as well. (I have posted this post on our Moms Club website but felt the need to share with one and all!)
Though my husband is pleased with my new dimensions we are both not pleased with the exposure to daylight my 'ladies' see on a regular basis due to my shirts not providing the coverage they once did for more of a flat-ish surface. My shirts are still ok, they just need some additional coverage one step down and I've been on the hunt for just the solution for awhile now. I wanted the chest coverage as well as the shoulder straps to provide adequate coverage for G's but not too stifling for my poor armpits (I'll admit my pits don't perform well when they are stifled!). I was also looking for a tank that would provide longer coverage over my pants so as to create a new dimension there as well to detract the eye from my still sagging baby gut. I'm now pleased to share with you a nice find that fits the bill for those of you who may be on this same hunt as well...
I've tried the Down East tanks - did NOT like their sizing or coverage claims to fame. I've tried cheapies at Wal-Mart and got just that...cheapies. I've tried Victoria Secret...and let's just say they weren't developed to provide coverage. I've tried Old Navy and the material was just too heavy and would stretch out. Carrying my huge chubby child around often further aggravates the problem and exposes more of my un-exposables! I've tried several various places all to no avail....until Target. Oh wonderful Target!!! They have tanks of various colors on sale for $8 right now that are wonderful. The fabric is soft and not stifling or heavy, yet holds (I think has some spandex in it). The pits are carefree yet the G's stay covered with no frequent adjustments throughout the day from me! It also covers the ladies with no hint of trashiness. The size and length are PERFECT. I bought 3 and have great plans for them (thinking of going back for more!)! I've washed them and no problems in that department either! Check me out when you get a chance, I'm sure I'll be sporting one! Oh what freedom and relief!

Ok, so this is a long post about tank tops, but I feel like writing something right now (I'm taking Elder Ballard's advice and getting back into some of my hobbies) and figured I'd share with you all my wonderful find in hopes of helping another chesty soul out there to find some summer relief!

Grandpa Taylor & Taylor Cousins!

Slade got to spend some fun time last night with his Taylor cousins (2 and 3 months older than he is), his Aunts and Uncles, his Grandpa Taylor and Great Aunt!

What cute little boys huh? And could they look any different from one another? I'm just picturing these little guys in suits walking towards the MTC together someday - WILD!

Tagged- My husband & I

Tagged by Christie about my favorite person - also my hubby!

1. What's his name? Mark Taylor (just like 5 other of his graduating class classmates!!)
2. How long have you been together? married 2 years yesterday! whoo hoo baby!
3. How long did you date? 1.5 years
4. Who eats more? Have you ever seen a Wilkinson woman eat?
5. Who said "I love you" first? Don't know that either of us have ever said that...j/k, I actually can't remember but it was probably me - Mark was too busy trying to discern the spirit about me...guess we see how that turned out though..haha
6. Who is taller? Mark by a few inches...okay maybe half a foot
7. Who sings better? I'd say it's a toss up as well, but Mark would say definitely him
8. Who is smarter? Mark's book smarter, but I'm street smarter (yikes, what does that say about us?
9. Who does the laundry? Me, but Mark'll 'help' out sometimes if he's tired of waiting for me to do it.
10. Who does the dishes? Both. see above about laundry.
11. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Mark, though I'd prefer it
12. Who pays the bills? Me, with Mark's money, only fitting since I make the bills...haha, j/k
13. Who mows the lawn? Mark, I'm allergic to anything that grows outside and the skeeters love my blood! I was literally outside in the backyard with Mark last night for 5 mins. and got a bite for each minute- it's no wonder I"m not an outdoorsy girl, sorry mark!
14. Who cooks dinner? Usually me...sometimes General Mills- nothing like cereal for every meal.
15. Who drives when you are together? I offer to drive for Mark b/c he drives so much for work already, but he usually drives.
16. Who is more stubborn? Mark's in denial that he's not the perfect human specimen, but he'd say that I'm more stubborn, of course.
17. Who kissed who first? Mark says he made a move to give me a peck and I gave him a downpour of sloppiness....then as he is not as experienced as I what kind of judge is he! Don't ask what # it was for me, I lost count in my early 20's...ewwwe.
18. Who asked who out first? I will admit to being the 'aggressor' here, he was my roommates hometeacher and a roommate and I dabbled over who'd go after him. We both knew a good thing when we saw one. I'm pretty competitve anyway, at least I used to be. Slade's not up much for competition yet.
19. Who proposed? Mark played my favorite song on his guitar (he had to start over 3 times b/c he was so nervous, we'd already talked about it, so he knew I was a sure thing) and then came over to me and kneeled down, then had to stand back up to get the ring out of his pocket, then kneeled down again and asked.
20. Who is more sensitive? Mark would say I'm overly sensitive...then again he recognizes it's a gender thing so he's ok with it.
21. Who has more friends? I'd say me but it's hard to tell who Mark is friends with. I picture friends as laughing, talking, sharing nonstop...but after observing Mark and his guy pals for awhile - I realize it's usually the opposite for guys- lots of silence interspersed with dudes and factual talk.
22. Who has more siblings? Me - by 2 3-girls, 3 boys vs. Mark's 4 boys (he thinks we don't have much of a chance at having a girl)
23. Who wears the pants in the family? I don't really think of it that way. We both have our roles where we take charge (amen Christie).
There you have it. I tag Claudia, Teresa, Katie, Amberlyn, Candice, & Kari - and anyone else who has something to say on this one!

Correct Me If I'm Wrong...

But this has got to be the cutest baby I've ever seen- 100% photogenic b/c he's 100% adorable!!! I'm trying to convince Mark that we should put him in commercials to build up a college fund for him (a good Dave Ramsey plan right?)... I know every mom is supposed to feel this way whether or not it's true (b/c we can't tell in reality, our own children are always the cutest) - but I'm thinking I can't be wrong about our little guy.

Now at 8 months (in 3 days) he is always 'anxiously engaged' in some activity or another and loves to be entertained - he's a very smiley little boy..when he's getting attention that is! He's a great eater (just like mommy) and loves to try whatever I give him at least once. Good for baby, not so much for mom. He says mama but does not yet know why and loves to scream continuously just for the fun of it so loud that the neighbors hear (seriously). He has started to giggle at the funny things we do without us tickling him - now that is cute! He's also a water baby- we go to the pool once a week and he loves to be dunked, so says I. Likes his doggies too.

Throw your vote in to convince him that I've got a good case!

It seems like he's really starting to strike poses lately!

Messy face man - I knew better!

Lounging after a hard 10 mins. of play!

Dad's tired after a long day, but I'm just getting going!

I love to play but I love mommy's attention more!

Ok, seriously does it get any cuter?!

He is actually talking here, he talks with his whole body.

Sharing his toys already!

So sad, the end! Now go vote! :)

Dave Ramsey Fanatic

My car is ten years old. I ride a Huffy K-Mart Blue-Light Special mountain bike. I have zero name brand clothes (sorry but I dont count Old Navy as name brand). I do not own any name brand shoes. I do not own an ipod. I do not own anything considered 'top of the line'. I only shop sales and am learning coupons as a way of life. My make up is from Wal-Mart as are my generic prescriptions and non-organically grown produce and groceries. I only own two very cheap bras. I make my own baby food. I make dinner from scratch (well, no frozen dinners anyway). I have not fixed the radio in my car for the past 2 years and it hangs open 24/7 (some goober tried to steal it and succeeded in breaking it then left it- thanks). I buy all of our fine dining serving platters and other types of deals at yard sales. I buy consignment baby clothing (mostly). We eat leftovers at least 3 x's/week. We are starting our own garden to make our own salads and such with. I make lunch for Mark to take with him to work every day. I use generic shampoo and get my hair cut in a student hair-cutting business. I am learning from Teresa that with some smarts and the right coupons you can get Walgreens/Rite Aid to pay YOU to buy their groceries and home products. I cut my fingernails as short as they go and my cheap toenail polish is in a constant state of repair. Our washer and dryer are from the 60's...literally. We only have one TV (one too many if you ask Mark), we have a renter, and we improve our home very very slowly. We do not have any debt except for our home (well, with the exception of my dang student loan, though the interest rate is less than 1% yipee). We are saving lots and paying extra on our mortgage payment (potential being that our home could be paid off before Slade hits elementary school) and plan to be millionaires by age 50, ok maybe 60, definitely by 70 many times over.

Ok, so Mark is the one who is the real movement behind us getting ahead, but I picked and married him so I've done my share of the work...haha.
If someone were to rob us...they'd get away with our TV and just leave the rest...they'd skip over to the neighbor's home with the BMW, the latest and greatest gadgets, the designer clothes, and the cabinet full of full-retail-bought food items.

Here's to Dave Ramsey and the working man!

The only times I get mad at Mark...

Are when Mark is mad at me...usually. Mark rarely gets mad at anyone, especially me, so when he does it's interesting. It's interesting b/c I would never guess what he would get mad at...usually.

Slade, our 7.5 mo. old, has had a slight cold this past week and his nose has been a little runny off and on. One day it happened to be quite runny (despite my best efforts with those darned bulb syringe thingys) and it was almost trailing into his mouth so I wiped it off with my finger and wiped it on his onesie. Mark witnessed this and was completely disgusted to say the least. He was so disgusted he was MAD! When asked why I had wiped it ON him I didn't really have a valid reason...hmm. I don't do that with myself and I don't see other people doing that...why did I? Dunno. I speculated that if I saw someone else doing that I might be disgusted as well...motherhood is wearing down my germ phobias I suppose..that can't be good.

He also gets mad at me when I happen to walk around in my undies - thinking the neighbors are squatting beneath our windowframes just waiting for that moment. I told him people aren't generally peepers and it would serve someone right if they did catch a glimpse of me. His remark was, "Guys are totally peepers" ..ah the things I wouldn't have guessed Mark participated in before we were married.

He also gets mad at me when I threaten him. I tell him if he ever tries to leave me or hurt me or my children he won't live to see another day. Now I make these comments usually after I've been revved up after a cozy episode of 'America's Most Wanted', so it's not like I have psychotic thoughts out of the blue generally. But regardless he views these comments as very disturbing and that makes him angry. What can I say...don't do the crime if you ...don't want to part with your manhood. (BTW, that is a HUGE peeve of mine - for those of you who've been tagging about peeves - if a man EVER leaves his wife and children to search for happiness elsewhere...he deserves whatever's comin to him). There's a nice Christlike thought for the day.

Conked on the head...

Today I was conked on the head. I'm not sure what exactly happened, just that I was sitting there and some random elementary child walks by and conks me on the head. I didn't see it happen...I felt it.

Teresa, Kari, and I decided to see what it would be like taking the boys and Maya to a matinee (rather than stay home and eat bon bons and watch Opera as my husband is sometimes convinced of). We don't really get out to see movies anymore (I think my last one was pre-Slade by 5 months) so why not? we decided.

Towards the end of the 30 minute long previews (seriously..why?!) about a gazillion elementary school kids and 2 teachers (ok, maybe more) came in. So now we miss some pretty integral stuff in the very beginning of the movie (National Treasure) while these goofballs file in - in madness. One kid even rolls down the isle ...voluntarily (who parents these children?).

Then the first conk came...Teresa was hit! What the heck!?! I figured some kid must have accidentally elbowed her in the noggin. (We were sitting in the very back row in case the babies acted up). Couldn't spot the kid b/c they were all in a blur going past us - ugh.

Later on in the movie as the zillionth child was up using the restroom - CONK! Some little brat conked me on the noggin - I wasn't sure what happened at first - it felt like someone butted heads with me. Not to mention the fact that I was holding a sleeping baby! Later when a teacher had him apologize to me (she must have witnessed the 2nd conk...I still wasn't sure it was purposeful) and I was taken off guard so I blurted a quick thank you (not sure why I thanked him...and not sure why I didn't make him apologize to Teresa as well!) to him and only realized after this transpired that he totally did it on PURPOSE!!! What the ________!?!?!? Seriously, who raises these children?!

On a funny side note, Slade grabbed Maya's hand and held it for a good 2 minutes (wouldn't you say Teresa?). So 14 years from now when he's begging for his first 'date' - I'll remind him he's already had it and he'll have to still wait 2 more years for another!

Also, every time a kiss scene came about in the movie all the kids boo'ed and yuck'ed it. That was amusing....if only we could keep them that way until they were about 30!

Harley Boogies

I've recently (finally) come to a very proud OCD conclusion that Harley boogies are just a way of life and I accept her as she is. If I find them all rubbed into the couch, sloshed around on the hallway wall, or on the baby's face, hair, or new outfit I will just toss my hair back, laugh it off and continue on my way. (I'll still wipe them off mind you, I'm not that accepting...I just will not lapse into a germ obsessed tyrade at Harley regarding her helpless, though useless and completely disgusting, bodily byproduct).